Estimated read time: 2 minutes and 48 seconds
Hey
Sometimes, all your best efforts at being a good parent come round and bite you in the bum.
You say: 'We only walk on the pavement!' You think: ‘I miss walking in the street’. :-(
You say: 'We eat at the table.' You think: ‘I love eating on the sofa’.
It’s a bummer. We teach them these life lessons, and then we have to stick to the script. Because if we don't, what are we? Just naggy hypocrites. Plus: if we don't do it, there's no way they'll do it!
When I’m trying to encourage Growth Mindset thinking in my toddler, I sometimes catch myself doing Fixed Mindset thinking. I have to check myself. And this morning, I really got caught out by it. Find out why in Noisy, where we're talking about recognising which mindset you are thinking with.
This week I'm talking about:
Noisy: Recognise
Book: Catch a Star
Club: How to wipe ya bum
Recognising is about noticing which mindset you or your child are using when approaching a task. It may not be obvious; you may need to get curious. Is your child avoiding something? Putting no effort in? Talking badly about themselves or their abilities? Maybe they're coming at it with that Fixed Mindset thinking.
Are they approaching something bravely, even though they don't understand or feel confident about it? Are they trying something again even though they've previously failed? Are they watching how others do it so they can learn? Perhaps Growth Mindset is in the house today.
But we have to recognise our own mindsets too because, again, they're never going to listen to a naggy hypocrite.
I recognised some Fixed Mindset thinking in myself today. My toddler requested a really annoying potty-related song this morning. After a quick search on Spotify, conveniently, I couldn't see it.
'I can't find it, sorry!'
'Did you try your hardest, Mummy?'
And that's where my good parenting backfired on me. I want her to be resilient and try her hardest, more than I didn't want to hear that song. But instilling a Growth Mindset in her means modelling one in myself.
So, back to Spotify. I tried a bit harder. And toddler got her song. I definitely could have done without the song but I was pleased to catch myself using the exact mindset I'm trying to teach her to overcome.
This week, I recommend looking out for and recognising what mindset you bring to different situations. But I hope it doesn't end with you having to listen to the potty song.
How to Catch a Star is one of the first books I read to my first ever class. It's about a little boy who is desperate to (you guessed it) catch a star. He keeps trying different ways to get hold of it. He doesn't give up, he just looks for another approach. Eventually he gets that star. And it doesn't look exactly how he imagined it – but he loves it anyway.
This is a great book for teaching children about the importance of trying different approaches when the first one doesn't work.
Club
This is up high on the agenda in our house atm. It's quite a hard thing to teach! Sharing this video for everyone with a child who's coming up to school age and is wondering how to make the independent bum-wiping successful. For those of you who've already got through this stage, I think you'll find this approach pretty genius anyway.
See you next week!
Becca
Have fun playing detective and working out which mindsets are in action in your house this week.
